962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.962ASSESSMENTS ON FILE2SUBJECTS ADMITTED IN 24 HOURSToo few assessments on record to report a sample without indicating who supplied it. The instrument remains on.

GLOBAL INSTITUTE OF GOONABILITY RESEARCH

VOL. 1 · CONTINUOUS SERIES · EST. 2026

RESEARCH SUBJECT #38574AWAITING FIRST ASSESSMENT

Objects & Artifacts

A Freshly Vacuumed Carpet

Pile aligned. Stripes intact for now.

RESEARCH NOTES

A carpet in the short interval after vacuuming, when the pile lies in neat parallel stripes and no one has yet walked across it. The stripes appear because fibers brushed in different directions reflect light differently.

Would You Goon?

0 = ABSOLUTELY NOT · 10 = UNCONDITIONALLY

Plate credit Photo: Tony Webster, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons · Source · License